... I'm so depressed right now... I haven't studied tonight... But of course, that's not why. I'm really angry at kaka today... Really really really angry... and actually, I don't really know why. But I'm so angry, I might hate--

... There's the thing. Okay. In ugama just now, Nissa ordered pizza from PizzaHut and treated us because we were still not studying. She ordered honey garlic and and tuna delight, in case you were wondering. The delivery took a very long time, we began to worry if they thought we were pranking kids.
Meanwhile we went for break-time. I'll get straight to the point. Kaka said if I were to come to the stadium last Saturday, I would just... embarrass her... I would just... be a spotful annoying tail... *wipes tears*... I took it as a joke at first, but when I thought about it... I get the feeling... "Wait... I guess that is true..." Then she told me Jyuu was going to be online tonight. And she'll only call him to be online for me if I behave well... *wipes tears*... I haven't talked to Jyuu for about five days... and she wants to keep it longer??
I offered her the pizza. She ordered me to deliver it to her at her class... or else no Jyuu. I told her I would be delivering it with my bare hands... because there's not much choice. So she doesn't want me to deliver it with my hands, but she wants me to deliver it...! I don't mind if she doesn't call Jyuu for me just because I didn't deliver a pizza. If I were doing it for her, that would make me desperate for Jyuu. You know softy me. I didn't care if I was going to talk to Jyuu after this or what. I just delivered it to her with a smiling face, wanting her attention. Typical me, guys =D
Then I got angry... "Why am I doing this for her??" I feel like a slave... She'll never tell me Jyuu's number... and it's like she's using that against me... I became so angry...
I went home and rushed to my room... Just as I was about to tell myself, "I hate--", it's like suddenly I became angry at myself. "Why are you hating--??!! You love her!" You see, I can't even bring myself to type her name after "hate". And I was so confused I just... burst...

Arit...